The mother-daughter relationship can be a complicated one…My relationship with my own Mama (Upfront Nana) has gone something like this:
Baby-13 years old: Adoration
13-15: Hormone driven dislike/frustration/fury/at times hatred
15-18: A combination of all the above
18-33: Love/best friendship/the odd disagreement
33-present: (Since having Poppy): Major respect/feelings of guilt at my hideous behaviour towards her as a teenager/even deeper love and friendship/general awe at how she managed to be such a great Mum and work full time.
It petrifies me that at some point the chances are high that like I once did to my own Mum, Poppy is going to say “I hate you” and slam a door in my face. I’m dreading that moment and am already mentally preparing myself for the teenage years and she’s not even 2 yet. I do live in hope though that she will one day become my best friend and partner in crime like I am with my own Mother.
Anyway, Upfront Nana is having something of a hard time at the moment. Her partner has just undergone major surgery and she’s feeling a bit low. Last week, in between hospital visits, she allowed herself some time out to spend a few hours having afternoon tea and doing a bit of shopping with me.
The tea was brilliant (If a little sickly). We went to the Chesterfield Hotel in Mayfair and had their Charlie and The Chesterfield Afternoon Tea. This involved A LOT of chocolate…chocolate tea, chocolate scones, chocolate golden eggs….I feel sick thinking about it. If you’re a chocoholic, love Roald Dahl and fancy something fun and eccentric, this is definitely for you though!
Anyway, full to the brim, we waddled up the road and further indulged in a bit of light retail therapy. It was at this moment that I realised that my Mum is in total denial and thinks that I am 24 rather than 34. The clothes that she picked out for me included tiny crop-tops, skimpy hot-pants and ‘body con’ dresses with actual holes in them. Then, after observing the queue in the changing room she announced that I should try them on in the middle of the shop.
“Are you mad Mum!?” I questioned. “I’m almost 35 and have had a baby. I can’t wear crop-tops and I’m sure as hell not trying one on in the middle of the shop”.
She looked slightly crestfallen and in turn looked shocked. “35!!!”, she exclaimed. “Oh my goodness. I totally forgot. I still see you as my little girl. Are you sure you’re not 25?”
It was then that I realised that when all the Mothers that you ever meet warn you how quickly time flies when you have a baby and how before you know it they’ll be going to university (which can be REALLY annoying when your newborn is keeping you up every night and you feel like this stage will never end!), they are actually right. My own Mama can’t believe that I am only half a decade away from being 40 and that I don’t want to wear crop tops and I’m sure I’ll feel exactly the same about Poppy one day.
-When your small child is keeping you awake and crying you feel like it will never end and that you will never sleep again. In actual fact, it will, you will and perhaps we really should be making the most of every moment even if at times we feel totally exhausted and crappy.
– Chocolate afternoon tea is a great idea but can make you feel really sick
-No grown woman should try on crop tops and hot pants in the middle of Miss Selfridge….even if her Mama says that it’s OK!!
For more from Upfront Nana, have a look at this.